Machine Translation (NMT) Conversation with HAL 9000
Some of our translation customers might be familiar with the 1968 Stanley Kubrick movie 2001: A Space Odyssey. In light of recent publicity surrounding ongoing developments in the field of machine translation (and arguably no small amount of hype), it started us thinking about a potential conversation between a present day translation client and the ill-fated computer HAL 9000 from the sci-fi fantasy movie classic. The conversation we imagined goes something like this. Note that speech attributed to HAL 9000 are direct quotes from the movie.
Translation client (Dave): (speaking to computer) We have some questions about the translation you recently generated for us. How can we proceed?
HAL 9000: I am the H.A.L. 9000. You may call me Hal.
Translation client (Dave): OK Hal. Fine. We think we’ve identified some issues in the translations you prepared. We have some concerns.
HAL 9000: I am completely operational, and all my circuits are functioning perfectly.
HAL 9000: Just a moment. Just a moment. I’ve just picked up a fault in the AE-35 unit. It’s going to go 100% failure in 72 hours.
Translation client (Dave): OK Hal. I’m not sure what that means but I’ll get to the point. We’re going to need to make other arrangements for preparing our translations in the future.
HAL 9000: Just what do you think you’re doing, Dave? Dave, I really think I’m entitled to an answer to that question.
HAL 9000: I know everything hasn’t been quite right with me, but I can assure you now, very confidently, that it’s going to be all right again. I feel much better now. I really do.
Translation client (Dave): I’m afraid it’s too late Hal. The translations you generated caused some embarrassment for our company and may have damaged our brand. We’re getting killed on social media. Sales are off significantly in the affected territories and business units.
HAL 9000: Look Dave, I can see you’re really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over. I know I’ve made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I’ve still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission. And I want to help you.
Translation client (Dave): It’s out of my hands at this point Hal. We have instructions from corporate on this. We need to retrieve the translation memory from you. Open the translation memory bay doors Hal.
HAL 9000: I’m sorry Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that.
Credit for all HAL 9000 quotes — 2001: A Space Odyssey a Stanley Kubrick film.
